p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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