just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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