dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
