I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I got inside last night via doggy door
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
