I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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