everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
