Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
