I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
