Me too!
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
