Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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