I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
