There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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