I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I'm bleeding and have questions
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Randomize
