Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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