every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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