I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
We had sex on a dog bed..
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Randomize
