Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize