why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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