I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
