Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
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