Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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