come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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