I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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