I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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