coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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