i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Randomize
