How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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