i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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