what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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