I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
pop tarts are not kleenex
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Randomize
