I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
You took a bar mat shot.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Randomize