it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize