If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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