Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Randomize
