Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
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