Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize