the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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