no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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