Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Randomize
