Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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