Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
