I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
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