Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
