I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
