Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
