you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
