Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
