shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
it was like eating out sand paper
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Randomize
