If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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