The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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