No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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