There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
