MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize