That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
please come you make the beer taste better
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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